Through each of our many long days and much short nights ('cuz we sleep through them, usually) we each meet a great deal of people. Some of these people are awesome, you can talk to them and you will be a better person for it. Some of them however, will be lame. Talking to lame people will immediately result in death of your soul, so it is of course a good idea to avoid talking to such people. One way to avoid lame people is to lock yourself in your room with tissue boxes on your feet, spending your days doing needlepoint portraits of the cast of Friends, another would be to simply hit anyone who approaches you socially in the head with a brick. As good as these options sound, they both tend to get you commited to insane asylums, and unless you're lucky enough to do your time in Gotham City, you won't meet anyone who isn't lame there. A better solution would be to simply know your enemy. If you can succesfully differentiate between lame people and awesome ones, you can choose who to be seen around, and who to mark down on that list you've been keeping for when the time comes and you finally take power by crushing those in your way. To make this task a little simpler for those of you leading too much of an on-the-go, in-your-face, and extreme-as-all-fucking-shit lifestyle, we here at have made a handy field guide to help you identify the common traits of lame people. So read on, and enjoy the fruits of the GPA and howawesomeisthat research labs putting their heads together for SCIENCE!

Let's move on to the powers of darkness.

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